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8-8-99
I apologize for not posting a syn the past few days...I feel asleep during Wednesday's snoozer and woke up sometime later to find that nine years had passed! Then I discovered that Belle was just experiencing SORAS (that, or Britney Spears found a new interest). Seriously though, I have been so busy with work and packing for school that we will be changing the format of the page so that I can keep up! Stay tuned for more...
8-6-99
I apologize for the lack of a syn the past few days. I haven't been in touch with Matt for the last day or two, and I fear the worst - we believe he may have been drugged with evil perfume and is now being held captive in Rolf's underground Paris lab. But since we already know where it is from the Queen of the Night in Paris story, I'm sure we'll have him out quickly. At least, we will if we don't slip into Salem time....Damn you, Stefano!!!!
8-03-99
Well, today's episode was almost too entertaining to parody. Just kidding. At SynCity, we look daytime drama in the face and laugh until our sides split.
The Hortons gather in Mike's office before the arbitration hearing to show their support.
Alice: Where's Laura? Why isn't she here?
Mike: She's out of town. Either in Colorado or Europe, I think. Some conference..."How to Deal With The Trauma of Laser Surgery" or something.
Maggie: (blowing dust off her shoulders) Actually, it's her turn to watch the kids in the attic. Mickey thought it would be good for me to put in the token cameo today. Incidentally, Jeremy says hello.
Mike: Carrie? Who said Carrie? I don't want her thrown into this!
Alice: JEREMY, dear. Remember, your child from a previous storyline?
Mike: Jeremy? Oh, yeah. And didn't I used to run guns or something in Israel?
All: HA HA HA HA
Alice: Sometimes you can be so funny, Mike.
Brandon goes to Lexie to discuss a...job??
Brandon: I'm looking for a position at the hospital, Dr. Carver.
Lexie: "Missionary" seems pretty popular around here, but I don't think we have any openings other than inside Carrie Reed's office. Anyway, what brings you to Salem, Mr. Walker?
Brandon: My sister, Nicole Roberts, lives here.
Lexie: You're related to that bitch?
Brandon: Mom thinks I was switched at birth with another crack baby...but anyway, it's unfair to judge me by her actions.
Lexie: You're right. That would be completely hypocritical of me, and since I'm the perfect character, that can't be possible. Let's look at your résumé.
Brandon: I have a degree in social work.
Lexie: (collapses in a debilitating fit of laughter) From where, Fisher-Price University?
Brandon: How'd you know?
Lexie: So then why did it take you six years to graduate?
Brandon: I spent the first two learning to read. And then I had to take some time off to practice my "social work" out in the field - er, I mean to save up money for school.
Lexie: Well, I have your résumé, Mr. Hardbody, I mean, uh, Walker. I'll be in touch. At least, I sure hope I'll be... {shoots a pointed glance in SSM's direction}
Lexie leaves Brandon alone on the balcony, where he is joined by Craig and Nancy.
Craig: You know, Brandon, if you were to sleep with Lexie, maybe she'd give you a job...
Nancy: Oh God, not again!
Meanwhile in Paris, the Salem sleuths try to unlock the mystery of the safe deposit box.
Bo: I think Gina may be here to steal the last Renet.
Eric: You may be right.
(Cue the Miami Vice theme music.)
Greta: So what you're saying is that Stefano brought Gina here to steal the last Renet?
Bo: Exactly.
Eric: We may be on to something...look what we found in the compact.
Bo: Whoa, a secret compartment! Didn't see that coming.
Greta: Way to go, Don Johnson.
Back at the hospital, the arbitration is about to begin.
Craig and Nancy: Ali, good luck. We're behind you 100%.
Ali: Bite me.
(Matt: Where, Ali, where?
Mandi: Matt, quit drooling and finish the damn synopsis.)
Craig and Nancy: Mike, good luck. We're behind you 100%.
Mike: Thanks, guys. (begins to sniffle and sob) Grandma, I'm in really big trouble this time, aren't I?
Alice: 'Fraid so, pretty boy. Excuse me - I have more important things to do, like beat the writers into giving me a real storyline. Be a good boy and I'll bring you some doughnuts in the poorhouse.
Carrie: Wait a minute...are you guys playing both sides?
Craig and Nancy: (Whistling, with the wide-eyed, "busted" stare) Nope, we would never do that. We're behind you 100%, after all.
Carrie: You guys are such good friends to me. What would I do without you?
Nancy: Have your affair in peace?
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